It's somewhat serendipitous that Creepshow 2 showed up in my DVD player unexpectedly last week (as mentioned in my last post). After I announced Titty Tuesdays the other day, I was thinking about various scenes that made an impression on my youthful mind, and one of the first ones I thought of was The Raft.
The Raft terrified me back when I first saw it. I was always a huge fan of Creepshow, and while I didn't think most of Creepshow 2 held up as well (I still loved it, just not as much as the first one), Creepshow 2's The Raft scared me almost as much as the original Creepshow's The Crate had. The whole concept of the man-eating oil slick and the people trapped in the middle of nowhere, exposed to the elements, gave me chills; but the scene that really got me was the one appropriately titled "Bad Time For Sex" on the DVD chapter menu.
The tale of The Raft is simple: two couples go out to a lake in the early fall; tourist season is over, it's deserted, but it hasn't yet gotten cold enough for them to bring the wooden raft in from the middle of the lake. The (supposedly-college-age-even-though-they-easily-look-thirty) kids decide to swim out to the lake for one last hurrah. They get there, only to get trapped on the raft by one big piece of meat-eating sludge. It eats a duck, then it eats Randy's girlfriend, then it eats LaVerne's boyfriend. Randy and LaVerne are trapped on the raft, and they agree to sleep in shifts, taking turns watching the troublesome predator, as it has already proven it can ooze up between the slats of the raft and suck them through if they're not careful.
It comes to pass that LaVerne is sleeping and Randy is dutifully taking his turn watching the oil slick. Eventually he gets bored at the prospect of being eaten alive, and can't help but notice that LaVerne is passed out and not wearing a whole heck of a lot. Ever the gentleman, he slooooowly makes his move on the slumbering woman, easing her sweatshirt up, up, up, until he can see and yes, even play with her boobies just a little. [INSERT MANY SHOTS OF HORROR TITTIES!]
But Randy loses his nerve as she starts to show signs of wakefulness and quickly pulls her shirt down, covering her back up. He's all ready to whistle and look totally innocent if she so much as glances his way.
Oh, but Randy won't be getting the ol' "you were touching me while I was sleeping, weren't you, pervert?!" lecture today! LaVerne has bigger things on her mind.
|what IS that?|
|oh dear GOD|
|IT'S EATING ME RANDEEEEEE|
(OK, she actually just screams his name repeatedly in disbelief and pain, but I like to add in the other parts because it makes me feel better.)
He just stands there looking stupid.
|this is the face of a date rapist|
|well, she used to have nice tits...|